Why is "For here or to go?" the most incomprehensible question on the face of the planet? The looks I get from customers transcend befuddlement. They are not merely confused. They are metaphysically transformed. "For here or to go in a grocery establishment?! Egads. This truly is a world of endless possibility..."
This was some sort of gyroscope exhibit, I believe. Don't quote me on that. Science is confusing.
They made the shape of a heart. A fanged, vicious, torso devouring heart. Made of claws. Bullet claws. OF DEATH. I got yelled at for tossing Frosted Flakes into their habitat. But what of breakfast, zookeep? What. Of. Breakfast?
Panda, panda, you're so great.
This is another gorilla. His name is Spencer "Don't call me Spence" McCoy. He is a grumpy gorilla. And what do we do to grumpy gorillas? That's right. Take their picture from multiple angles until they pound the glass with horrifying rage. Science is fun!
Enjoy the adoration while it lasts, baby gorilla. Today, they coo and clap if you throw poopy at Grandma. Tomorrow, you'll be pelted with banana peels and quarters just like the rest of 'em.
Alas, with that drivel out of the way, we can continue our zooventures with full thermoses and fresh pickles. After an ape-tastic lunch, the wife and I ventured towards the Polar Rim (sans penguins...I know, right?).
We beheld the majestic Ice Beaver with wonderment in our eyes. We learned from Kevin, the local zoologist (science lingo for zoo dude), that Ice Beavers are nearing extinction thanks to our good friends at Global Warming, Inc. "GWI: Raping the scorched corpses of your favorite animal species since 1902".
This was some sort of gyroscope exhibit, I believe. Don't quote me on that. Science is confusing.
They made the shape of a heart. A fanged, vicious, torso devouring heart. Made of claws. Bullet claws. OF DEATH. I got yelled at for tossing Frosted Flakes into their habitat. But what of breakfast, zookeep? What. Of. Breakfast?
Panda, panda, you're so great.Your hugs I do appreciate.
But I like bamboo much more.
Deforestation's what's in store.
La la la la la la la,
La la la la la la la.
This is another gorilla. His name is Spencer "Don't call me Spence" McCoy. He is a grumpy gorilla. And what do we do to grumpy gorillas? That's right. Take their picture from multiple angles until they pound the glass with horrifying rage. Science is fun!
Enjoy the adoration while it lasts, baby gorilla. Today, they coo and clap if you throw poopy at Grandma. Tomorrow, you'll be pelted with banana peels and quarters just like the rest of 'em.To be continued...again!
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